Don't bother saving me, I'm already dead.
by Agent mothgirl
Summary: Five years after invader zim took off, Dib has lost all hope, Gaz has a secret, Zim is doubting his mission, and everyone is depressed....


Disclaimer: I do not own invader Zim. Johnen does. I love him. He is a God.  
  
Rating: PG-13 for cussing, adult themes  
  
Summary: It has been five years since when Invader Zim began. Dib is now 16, Gaz is 15, Zim is still older than any human alive, but about....23 in Irken years. Dib and Zim are both sophmores, while Gaz is a freshmmen. K, let us begin.  
  
  
  
Dib woke up to the annoying sound of his alarm. He didn't want to go to school, he was tired. Well, he always was. So tired.......Dib hasn't changed much, looks-wise. He kept his glasses, and the trenchcoat, and wears everything he had in a bigger size. He now has two wild pieces of hair, one sticking the same way it alwas did, and one, going forward and then drooping down between his eyes. His eyes.......they have maybe changed the most. They used to be filled with ambition and enthusiasm, now empty and sad. They always looked so tired.........always had bags surrounding them. Dib was skinny, too. Not freakishly thin, but too thin for a sixteen year old boy. He is even more pale now, too. Despite this, he is still handsome, but there is something about him that just makes people shudder.  
  
Dib got up and got into his normal clothes. As he stepped into his bathroom, he felt a rush of cold air. Yup, his bathroom was definately creepy. He brushed his teeth, not daring to look in the mirror, not wanting to see the empty shell he became. He had a feeling he was being watched, but shook it off. As he rinsed his mouth, he took a good look at himself. All he could do was breathe a heavy sigh, and then slightly gasp as he saw a girl behind him in the mirror. It was Ren, his ghost. Such a beautiful one, too. She never spoke a word. She had these gourgeous haunting red eyes, with jet black hair, and white streak on each side. She always looked at him with such a longing in her eyes. When he first saw her, at the age of thirteen, he asked how old she was. On a paper she wrote 18. When asked how she died, she lifted up her sleeve of her pajamas and showed him a terrible mess of scars and slits on her wrist. He shuddered, thinking of all the times he had had thoughts of commiting suicide.  
  
After he was done he got his keys to his car, and waited for Gaz. She strolled down the stairs. Dib looked at her. She had changed so much. She now had long, flowing hair to her mid-back, which reminded him so eerily of his mother. His mother.......Dib had only told one person what happened to her: His shrink. He just looked at him with an"okay you are a nutjob" look on his face. All Dib could muster up in his memories was he and his mother taking a stroll down his street when he was four, a bright light engulfing her from above, and a spaceship taking her away He had now tried to stop all the paranormal shit. No one understood him anyway. He convinced himself as a fantasy-prone personality and that he made himself believe she was abducted by aliens. That's what sparked his fascination in the paranormal, to solve the unexplained. He made himself believe by solving the unexplained, he could find those aliens and one day bring her back. His shrink just said that he was in denial, because Professor Membrane told Gaz and the shrink that she left them. He knew he was wrong, that his Dad was just mad because he finally came face to face with a problem that had no scientific explanation for it, and that the great scientist couldnt solve something. He took another look at Gaz. She was still gothic, and still a little abrasive, but she had warmed up to her brother a little bit in the past five years. She always had this faraway look in her eyes, though. She now had a boyfriend. Yup. Dib would be proud of her, if it was someone else other than the stupid womanizer track star that she was dating now. Red hair, blue eyes, a real pretty boy. He knew he would go after Gaz, especially after seeing all the guys drooling over her curves on her first day of school. She seemed so happy with her boyfriend, Ray, but sometimes.....he'd hear her crying in her room at night. He wanted to be the big brother and comfort her, but she always shut him out of her life. She also had some unexplained cuts and bruises, and he was afraid she was hurting herself.  
  
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Dib and Gaz stepped out of the car, and Dib saw his own personal hell right in front of him. High school. He knew he was going to be in a shitload of trouble, and he'd have to explain why he ditched the past eight days of school. Oh well. Gaz saw her boyfriend and she immediately got this unreadable look of....happiness and....disgust? She ran up to him and he walked her into school. Dib walked in his homeroom period, to see a face that used ot be very special. Dib kinda gets embarrassed as he thinks of how obsessed he was with ZIm , and still secretly is. Just shows how he has no life. Zim had grown, he was now 5'5. Not that tall, Dib was 5'8. He didn't know how Zim grew, maybe it was from the climate of Earth? Dib smiled. Zim was still trying to take over the world. HEHeh, that's what probably attracted Dib to Zim the most, his persistence. Yes, Dib was bisexual, and he did have a little thing for Zim. It's not nearly as big as it used to be, and they never talked anymore. Dib wasn't in love with Zim as much as he was intruiged by him. Dib knew it was only a crush, it wasn't a flame like it used ot be, but there are a few sparks here and there. Dib didn't hate Zim anymore, he already waved the white flag. Yes, he surrendered two years ago. Dib respected him now. He truly was an ambitious man-er..thing. Zim still had the compassion and ambition, he kept oing, but Dib...well, he wasn't as strong as Zim. That's why he admired him so much. Dib didn't give a fuck whether the human race was enslaved or not anymore. He hated them all, almost. Years of being ridiculed because of his beliefs wasn't what caused him to sink in the thought that maybe the human race can't be saved, because in a way they already destroyed themselves, or maybe he they just weren't worth saving. No. Something happened on September 11 five years ago that made him realize there isn't good inside everybody. But he still kept going. But the years of war and terror that went on and were still going on since that attack just made him give up. Senseless attacks were made on his homeland, and senseless attacks were made by his homeland. He took another look at Zim. Zim ditched the elvis hairstyle, and now had spiky hair about two inches long. He still had the green skin, those same cute blue eyes, that same idiot robot thing, and humans still didn't recognize him. Zim was currently best friends with Tak. They were probably secretly plotting something, but Dib didn't care. he was too tired.  
  
It seemed like forver until school was over. That's when he saw it. In the parking lot, by Ray's car, was Ray grabbing Gaz by the arm and yelling at her. Gaz? Why would she take this shit? She's the toughest girl I know. She winced as Ray raised his hand right after looking around to see if anyone saw him, and brought it down on Gaz's face. She had an apologetic look on her face, and Dib got a little closer to hear Ray yell, "So, you talking to that Damien guy again? Huh, you fucking whore, you don't deserve me, you should be thankful I took you in and made you popular you ugly little bitch!" As he brought his hand up once more, Dib rushed over.  
  
"Get the hell away from her!" Dib yelled with rage filled in his eyes.  
  
"Dib? no, don't...just leave, he wsn't doing anything!" Gaz said.  
  
"Hey , i know you, you're that fag that said the pyramids were made from aliens last year! Hah! What are you gonna do you little queer? huh?" Ray taunted in an annoying way. The words, "fag", and "Queer", got Dib a little pissed off, knowing this guy was some dumb homophbe who was a total closet case. Dib suddenly realized where the bruises and cuts on Gaz's arm were coming from. Suddenly, Dib got an adrenaline rush, and he felt something burning inside of him. Something he hadn't felt since he used ot chase Zim with handcuffs(no, not around the bed you dirty people! ^_^) He charged the guy and sphered him to the floor. While Ray lay on the floor in shock, Dib kicked his face, and knocked some teeth out.  
  
"Not so pretty now, are we, Ray? Now go away before I tear you another asshole."  
  
Ray scurried outta their half crying, hald mumbling something. Dib was shocked at his sudden strength. He turned to look at Gaz, whom was on the verge of tears.  
  
"Oh, Gaz, why didn't you tell me?"he asked. Gaz just broke down crying and flung into Dib's arms. Dib hugged her tightly back. For the first time since Gaz was born, he had held her in his arms while she cried. He had been the big brother he always wanted to be. It made him realize maybe some things are worth saving, and living for. He now had another reason to live: to protect his sister, who was practically alone in the world. And for the first time in three years, he smiled a true smile.  
  
***~~~Next chapter: New student, Dib's ghost talks, Ray wants revenge, and we focus more on ZIm in this chapter, and the net chapter will have more dialogue. Sorry, I just wanted t o do some reflecting from my favorite chracter, Dibby!~~~***  
  
Stay tuned for chapter 2 in about a....week or so? maybe, depends on the reviews. 


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